An Epiphany

Ever have one of them? An epiphany? A friend of mine likes to call them "The Epiphany" but somehow that indicates there is only one — and, for me, of late, there's been more than one.

When I was dating my wife, we'd go to her brother's house for family gatherings, picnics, and swim in the pond with the nieces and nephews. Up by the house, a table sat at the edge of the large deck under the shade of a large oak tree. As I lazed in the sun on the small sandy beach area, I'd see them, the aunts and uncles, the old people, sitting at that table enjoying their coffees or lemonades.

The years have passed. My brother-in-law and his wife have moved into a small trailer set a little closer to the pond. His eldest son has taken over handling the "estate" of six acres. We had a party the other day. All the family showed. The grandkids and great-grandkids frolicked in the pond, running helter-skelter here and there. I sat at the table at the edge of the large deck under the shade of the huge oak tree. I was enjoying my cup of coffee, talking with the other siblings of my wife's family, watching the kids. I was once more reminded of how the old people (the aunts, uncles, moms and dads) would sit at the table and...

OMG!

I was the 'old people' at the table.

Sure, Uncle Earl passed. Aunt Mary went to her Heavenly reward. Even mom and dad had taken their turn visiting the Pearly Gates.

But, wait, when had the baton been passed. When did I — that's right, the three of us — me, myself, and I — when did we become one of those to sit at the esteemed table of elders?

I longed for the sunny beach; to allow myself to throw caution to the wind, no reservations, allow the sun to crisp my body to a golden brown.

I held my hand over my eyebrow to shade my view and see the kids out in the water.

NO! I'd seen my wife's dad, and her Uncle Earl do that. Not me! It couldn't be me!!

I sipped my coffee, resigned to the fact — I was old. I'd moved on. No longer was I the stud lounging on the beach. My heydays were over.

Never!!

I stood, my bones creaking and cracking in the action. I was going to take my rightful place back in the sun. As I was about to leap off the low deck onto the lawn, I thought better of it, turned and carefully, one step at a time, made my way down the staircase and to the path to the pond.

About four steps later I realized the truth. I hurt. The idea of getting down, laying on the beach, allowing the glorious sun to bathe my body...

I cringed. Thoughts assailed me.

     1. That's a lot of white flesh to expose, not only to the sun, but to the world.
     2. They don't have a crane handy — how are you getting back up?
     3. Your six pack is more like overstuffed carry-on luggage.
     4. Do you really want to hear the kids, grandkids and others laughing?
     5. Or worse, crying for you to put on more clothes?

With the sincerest look I could offer, I turned to the others on the porch deck and said...

"Damn! I forgot what I was going to do!"

And humbly walked back up to sit at the table.

There is honor in growing old. It is a rite of passage. You are an elder to be respected.

Yeah, right! That's a lot of hogwash.

As Judge Thurgood Marshall stated when asked why he was retiring...

Because I'm old!

Yes, I'm old but I do believe I'd remember when the baton was passed to me. Obviously, as I have now learned, it is done without any pomp or circumstance. No ceremony. It is a simple case, one day you don't have the baton, the next day you have it. I also discovered, it does not, I repeat, does NOT come with instructions.

In fact, a little head's up — very little of growing up comes with instructions. Sure, you get guidance when you're young, but when you hit a certain age, all those who are older than you, well, they have moved on, and suddenly, you are now the font of all things important, somewhat relevant, and unfortunately, more often than not, totally useless information of a period gone by.

A few years ago, the matriarch of my wife's family passed. Yes, my mother-in-law, at the ripe age of 103 (one hundred and three) went to her Heavenly home. My parents had already passed. At that moment, although I hadn't realized it at the time, my wife and I became the matriarch and patriarch of our family, as did my wife's sisters and brother with their families.  The baton had been passed. There was none for us to go to for advice. We now were the Oracles, the deities of information, good or bad.

Epiphany.

When did I get to this point? How did I get here?

The answer is simple. I got here one breath at a time... and there were a lot of them.

As king, my first proclamation...

HELP!!

Until next I ramble on...

Christmas Retrospect

Today is Christmas Eve Day and I am sitting at my desk watching the fine snow continue to fall. This morning was church and then my wife and I had an enjoyable lunch with friends at a local restaurant.

The snow started to fall while we were in church. We walked in and the ground was clear. We came out to a light coating of white and extremely slick roads and sidewalks. Uh, "extremely slick" is being very kind - I almost fell on my dignity as I headed for the car. As we drove to the restaurant, I decided - after attempting to stop - it was wiser to continue on through the yellow light. When the group broke up to head home, I decided to go "that extra mile" and see a house I thought we'd look at later if it truly piqued our interest. I slowed up to look at the home and then attempted to turn into a driveway to turn around. My wife kept telling me "Don't hit the telephone pole" like it was my goal in life. I didn't - repeat DIDN'T - want to hit the pole. In fact, I didn't even want to go off the blacktop driveway and into the yard... but, I did. Fortunately the gravel at the edge of the driveway and the first crops of grass stopped me and I only "trespassed" about 3 feet into the yard. With luck, the spring rains should wash away all the evidence.

While on the highway, cars were going faster than I wished to drive and some of them seemed to have difficulty remaining in their lane. I decided to take the back roads home with a lot less traffic. Of course, that didn't mean the roads were any better or safer.  Approaching my driveway at the outrageous speed of 15 mph... Yeah, I almost overshot the driveway, finally slip-sliding my way into my driveway which is gravel.  As one would expect, even it was slippery so there is this little wiggle in the tire tracks leading up to house.

I'm inside and have NO intention of going outside except to let the dog out. Our dog will go out, potty and immediately return to the house. We are watching (dog-sitting) our son's dog. It is spoiled rotten, and has been raised in a fenced yard. Why do I say spoiled? You have to be outside with her while she does her business. If I tie her to the chain - 30 ft with a pole out in the middle of yard - so she has plenty of running space - she will whine and bark to come back in, totally disregarding her business. But, wait, she remembers that she had to go potty and well, SURPRISE!  To avoid that surprise, I stand out there in the weather and wait for her to run off her excess energy and do her business. Sounds like a little wimpy dog, right? Wrong, this is a pit bull with muscles that exceed mine about 3 to 1, maybe 4 to 1. Plus, if she wasn't so damn lovable I'd just turn my back, but she's just a big lap dog who doesn't realize she isn't a lap dog. Maybe I should note at this time - the dog has decided turn about is fair play - if I leave the bathroom door open, she watches me. If I close the door, she patiently waits outside the door, sticking her nose as far under the door as possible. Personally, I don't think these moments should be shared, but...

I've digressed. And I usually do. Sorry.

Christmas. I remember as my kids got older, my parents and in-laws didn't seem as much "into" Christmas. I mean they shared a couple of gifts, but the Christmas morning hoopla was missing. Now, I have grandchildren and great grandchildren. The children are spread here and there with their in-laws spread even farther it seems. So, we had our "family" Christmas last weekend, 12/19, with all them present - all 28 of us in one house. Talk about chaos and fun. We even had 7 kids who are under the age of 3 to keep things hopping.

So, today my wife and I head to church and it is Christmas Eve Day... but, it doesn't feel like any other day of the week or year. I mean, tomorrow is Christmas and we'd probably just sleep in and finally, some time during the day, decide to open the gifts we bought each other. No hoopla. No whoop-de-doo-dah. The gifts? More likely useful items that either of us could have bought any other day - jammies, underwear, socks, gloves, etc. I could have bought my wife jewelry but I've done that over the years for special occasions, birthdays and other gift days. She has more jewelry than she will probably ever wear. Some I've even forgotten I've bought for her... let's just say, when she passes, the DILs and granddaughters will each probably receive a beautiful piece of jewelry to remember her.

Outside the snow is still falling. It is beautiful. The fine snow is dusting all the tree and bush branches.

So, tomorrow, my #2 son who is celebrating Christmas today with his 3 children, their spouses and children are like us. Nothing to get all excited about on Christmas Day.  They've invited us to join them for a day at the casino in Toledo. At first I hesitated but, again, it feels like any other day and it might be fun to do as something different. I mean, we could just sit at home... but, why?

The Christmases I remember from my youth are no more. Families are no longer just living a few miles from each other. Work schedules even force employees to work on Christmas. I remember in our town, each Sunday everything was closed except ONE gas station and ONE drug store - and those stores took turns rotating as to who would be open. Come Christmas there wasn't anything open except the police, fire department and hospitals - and I think they were running skeletal crews so everyone could have part of the day with their families.  Oh, and maybe the local Chinese restaurant was open. In my small mid-America "village" there was no Oriental restaurants back then.

If my #3 son was still an EMT on the fire department, he'd be working today and tomorrow, a 4 hour shift. My #4 son needs to go in and make sure the furnace is going at the steel mill. My #1 and #2 sons had to work yesterday (Saturday) and of course, will be back to work on Tuesday. My #2 grandson needs to be at work Christmas night to start the week and his wife needs to handle a shift at the local carryout. My #1 granddaughter will do a shift today at the hospital and a partial shift tomorrow for Christmas.

Someone told me they had a choice - they could tell their employers they wouldn't work those days. I think the employer response was simple: Work or don't bother coming back. Today there are too many people wanting good jobs, even mediocre ones, to demand too much.

It would be nice to go back to the Christmases of the 50s where children believed in Santa until at least the 3rd or 4th grade. Where families got together - grandparents, children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren gathered together to celebrate Christmas, the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus.

[SIGH] Today it is all about how many and how expensive the gifts are. Several years ago my #2 granddaughter and wife were talking about Christmas. My wife told her one year she got a new doll and a few homemade clothes from her parents and grandparents. My granddaughter hugged my wife and said "I'm so sorry, grandma. You deserved more." Today's kids seem to get so many presents they don't know which one to play with first. I remember getting new pajamas, a shirt, a collection of classic books, and a Lionel O-Gage train set that I needed to share with my brother. My hanging sock had an orange, peanuts in the shell, a candy cane and a small toy stuffed down in it. That was the Christmas just before my 9th birthday (circa 55?) and was one of the best - I loved that train set. There were no other family members. Why? My parents moved to NW Ohio in 1953 from Iowa where my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins lived. We were alone with no nearby family.

Wow. I guess my parents were some of the originals who started to separate the nucleus family. I never thought of it that way until this very moment.

I was taught in high school that the nucleus family started to breakup in the early-mid-50s. I didn't see or understand what it was about.

The nucleus family. Back then there were neutrons, electrons and protons to make up the family. Over the years those have disappeared and there is barely the nucleus left - who can honestly say they sit down to a family meal at the table each night?  TV trays in front of the boob-tube don't count.

It's still snowing. Some things don't change. We'll have a White Christmas this year.

Until next I ramble on...

Trying Something New

I've been writing this blog for several years, always trying to "capture" an essence of what I wanted to say, but always failing in the completion.  Okay, not a total failure, but I've always felt my blogs were somewhat lackluster. Yes, occasionally I would have one that stood out, glistening in the sunlight, but more often than not, most of the posts were either drab, boring updates or some rant. Again, maybe more rants than updates.

Today I want to try something different. In addition to my usual mundane update and/or rant, I want to add personal items about me.

Why, you ask? Because I want you to know me, the guy who puts this all together. Sure, everyone knows I write and I cook and I have a wife, kids and grandkids. But... do you really know me?

First, my updates. I've been busy the last few weeks doing edits for my writing clients. I really enjoy doing them because I get to be on the cutting edge of what is new coming out. Plus, I feel I am giving back to the writing community, teaching others how to improve their skills as writers.

If all goes well, once more I'll be teaching a class at Terra State Community College in Fremont, OH. This one will be a shorter class, about three weeks. It is about using dialog for characterization. I'm hoping the students find it useful and helpful.

My garden is coming to harvest.  I have nine (9) tomato plants with a couple of plants of several different varieties. I tried something different this year rather than the same old types as I have grown in the past.  The most unusual one was the Jersey Devil, a 'Roma-type' tomato. Here's a picture of them growing and another with my hand around one still growing to ripeness.

Notice their length? And inside is basically all meat with just a few seeds.  Great for salsa, stewed tomatoes and purees.

This is my wife's first batch of salsa for 2017. There wasn't quite enough to make 8 pints so Yours Truly got to do a little QC that night.  And I wiped out what was left of the tortilla chips.  My wife went to the store and bought two big bags so I won't run out. She has since canned 6 qts of stewed tomatoes, another 11 pts of salsa and 8 pts of tomato juice. She looked at the garden and made the following comment. "[heavy sigh] And this is only the start of the season."

I should mention she also canned 9 qts of dill pickles, 8 pts of banana peppers and I have a couple heads of cabbage - to which I will make a lot of egg rolls for the freezer. There is a bevy of green peppers and I'll be making my infamous freezer green pepper casseroles for the winter.

In addition to all this canning, we're also camping. I finally got the RV toilet repaired. It became a fiasco with always something to stymie me as I attempted the project. Let's just say, after several months (this started the fall of 2016) we were finally able to go camping, and camping we did. Almost a month of camping. A week with friends, a week alone, a week with granddaughters and another week alone. Sure, it was only for a few days each week... being honest, the first week was five nights, the week alone was four nights, the one with the granddaughters was three nights since we had other activities planned and the last week was another four nighter.  We prefer to camp during the week to avoid the weekend chaos and cramped camping.  With school just around the corner, camping is going to be mostly seniors until the nights get too cold. Me? I enjoy those brisk nights, sitting around the campfire, enjoying the fall in all its glorious colors. Having been involved with Scouting since I was 10 yrs old, I have no issue camping when the snow flies and have done it several times - in a tent, no less!

Oh, before I forget. I actually got back to writing my own stuff again. Last night I was able to put just a hair over 1000 words to my followup Amish novel - The New York Voice.  It will still need some heavy-handed editing, but I'm thrilled to be writing, again.

Now, for the new stuff.  Here goes...

My favorite color ever since I was a little kid, let's say at least a half century ago... plus a tad more, was red. I love red. But, I've matured a lot since I was a grade school kid and my colors have changed. Not really. I still love red but it is so brash. I've learned I also love green, especially the deep forest greens. And I enjoy a good shade of blue. My wife has taught me to embrace shades of purple, more so the violet shades she enjoys.

One of my granddaughters wanted to make me something special for my birthday and asked my favorite color. I tried to explain my hesitancy to blurt out the color red, instead telling her I liked all the colors of the rainbow.  She made me key chain fob. It was very colorful with red being the main color, but she did a great job blending in all the other colors and not make it look like a rainbow but have almost every color of the rainbow in it.

As with my choice in colors, my music choices are even more eclectic. One cannot point at me and say 'There goes a rock and roll man' or 'He's really into classical music.' Me? I roll with the waves of the ocean and my music is about as varied as the waves of the seas. To get you started, here's one of my favorite music groups, Brulé performing 'Spirit Horses.'

No, I am not Native American, but, even as a young lad playing "Cowboy and Indians" - yes, I'm THAT old - my younger brother always had to be the cowboy with the guns which left me the Indian. As I got older I was drawn to the American Indian mystique and enjoyed doing beading and recreating Indian headdresses. I even learned, at the "ripe" age of 15 some words of the Indians who lived in the NW Ohio area - the Delaware aka the Lenni Lenape or just plain, Lenape. 

Anyway, to give you a little more insight to me, here's another piece of music I enjoy.

Now, so you totally understand what I mean by the words "I enjoy" or "love" this music. I have these songs on my computer and have had them on my computer for decades for some of them. I listen to them repeatedly - and I do mean repeatedly. I may play a song over and over - as many as a dozen or more times - before moving on to the next song. Some of my music has transferred across as many as ten different computers and laptops over time. Probably more. I kept my music list on all - and I mean ALL - my computers... even at work. My play list is now about four (4) hours long and I keep adding to it as new songs come along or I find a digital copy of an old song I just have to have.

If you have a favorite piece of music, share it with me. Maybe we'll find a common ground.

In future blogs we'll discuss my favorite foods, share some recipes, more music, what I enjoy reading and whatever I feel is necessary for you to know me, Bob Nailor - the guy, the husband, the father, the grandfather and great-grandfather, the writer, the traveler, the gardener, and more.

Until next I ramble on...

So Tired Of It...

Who really cares?  I mean, are there people out there who need to know this information and, if they don't, their lives are incomplete?

That's right, I'm about to rant.

Do I really need to know all about Brooke Shield's wrinkle erase cream?

Do I really need to discover Megyn Kelley's little off-show OR on-show secrets?

Do I even need to know what pill Mark Cuban is taking? Or why? OMG!

OR why one of the Kardashians is having a rough go of it? I know, life is so mean to millionaires.

Everyone is screaming their Internet is slow, it takes too long to load this video or that video. Really? You're going to watch a video about what pill Mark Cuban is taking so you can order it? If you want the pill, does it really matter if Mark Cuban is taking it? Does his decision decide yours?

If we could get rid of all the stupid SPAM - not the canned meat type - that is cluttering our networks, just think how much faster the Internet would be.

I'm a 70+ married white male with four children, ten grandchildren and currently, five great-grandchildren.

The last thing I need in my inbox is...

1. A secret date with some cougar. I'm not looking for a 80 to 90 year old woman.
2. A secret date with somebody's wife.  I have my wife, why do I want somebody else's?
3. A prestigious position within the Business Women's Society or some such crap. I'm a guy!
4. Seeing naked photos of supposed "nearby" women who need to be satisfied.
5. To save $1500 on a walk-in tub. If I'm saving $1500, the tub is too expensive.
6. Be involved with a Zuckerberg venture and/or Facebook.
7. Discover ways to enhance my manhood. At this point in my life... does it matter?
8. Anything about Gwen Stephani and/or Blake Shelton. What they do is their business.
9. Any of the new diet pills and/or weight-loss fads. I'm fat; I'm happy - so leave me alone.
10. I don't need medicinal anything - drugs or pills. I'm 70+, I've learned to cope so far without it.
11. A total stranger's hoo-ha. Imagine my shock with the email that read "You Want This?" and when the email came up, it was a close-up shot of some woman's vagina. One of my grandchildren could have went to my computer and seen that since I leave me computer on 24/7 and usually have my email up, running during that time.
12. An opportunity to send somebody $5k so I can get $150 million to assist in a transaction from Africa (or Europe, South America, Far East) of an extremely wealthy spouse of a slain official.
13. And the list goes on and on.

Just think, if just the above type emails didn't clog the Internet, we could all probably run on a 56K modem - no, not really. I'm kidding. BUT, we'd all see things happen a lot faster.

WHY?

ISP (that's your Internet Service Provider) wouldn't need to attempt to go through all the email coming to your email box and attempt to eliminate as much as possible before sending it on through to you.  I know, I have my own domain and establish SPAM rules to eliminate a lot of email for my domain(s) I handle. You won't believe all the stuff that still manages to get through.

Spammers are smart.  They use things like "Bootilicious," Booty Licious," "Bootie Licious," Booty-Licious," Bootie.Licious," and the list goes on and on with variations.  Oh, and they also attempt this method "BoOtY LiCiOuS."  And, yes, variations on it, too.

As it has been stated in the past, it is difficult to make something totally idiot proof because idiots are so ingenious.

I remember the good ol' days (he sighs) when I could be on the phone and send an email to the person on the other end and almost instantly they'd say "Got it!"  Now, with all the way-stations and spam filters in place, it can take upwards of twenty minutes to get that same email.  The sending ISP will check the mail for viruses and attempt to ascertain that it is not spam, and depending on the route taken, a couple of other places will also test the email for viruses and spam.

The sad part, if you put into your email, say to a client or customer, the following sentence:

Yes, I said it was FREE!

That sentence alone could flag it as spam. You capitalized the word "free" which for some spam filters, is a flag to be counted.  If your email letter gets too many flags, it is considered spam and goes into the spam box and the world may never see it.

The truly sad aspect of spam - real mail may get stopped and tossed away while the crappy spam email comes through, totally unscathed.

Some spam filters look at the content size and if the flags count up... but the text size is large, it is allowed through.  Hence the emails of spam now filled with useless garbled blurbage at the end. It gets the text count up to offset the flag count. As I said, idiots are so ingenious.

What can be done? Really - nothing.  Like my friend who despises the canned meat known as SPAM, even if you ignore it, it still remains on the store shelves, indicating that somebody somewhere is buying it.

I guess the same is true for all the other spam - out there in the great web of cyberspace, somebody is clicking on the link to discover the "truth" about Brooke Shield's wrinkle cream... or wanting to enhance the size of his manhood.

We all have our dreams... I dream of an Internet without spam.

Until next I ramble on...

A Writing Dilemma

Now exactly what could be so horrific to cause a writer to panic?

I'm 70+ years old and have several novels published, both traditionally and self-published. Not to mention several articles and posts that have offered internationally. Still, I, like so many other authors, remain unknown.

I'm considering not to continue my supposed writing career. At my age, I should be rocking away on the front porch, enjoying life as it passes by.

REALLY?

Enjoy life as it PASSES BY?  NO!  NO!  NO!

I had a few days this week when I actually considered dropping from the authorial world and just enjoy life, playing with the grandkids and great-grandkids, gardening, reading, and traveling. I almost had myself convinced to just sit back.

Then I decided I would step back from writing and just finish up those few novels I'd written and either never finished or needed to clean up to publish.  That sounded like a better idea. It could be something I do while we are traveling and camping... or sitting on the front porch. LOL.

I figured a one-year sabbatical - two years at the most - would be sufficient.

So, I made a list of those novels I needed to work on... uh, all 26 (the count so far) of them. That's correct!  I have 26 novels in different stages of completion. I actually may have more if I scrounge around on my laptop and backup files. This number does not include the myriad of short stories I have written.

Needless to say, I don't want to peek into the sub-directory named "Future Plots" or the other one named "Ideas" for fear of what I may find there.

Therefore, with the idea of not writing anymore now entrenched in my mind, I have decided that perhaps I should reconsider another avenue.

I won't write any more NEW books until I have the ones already on my laptop finished.

Exactly what does this mean?

It means I won't be participating in any future NaNoWriMos (that is National Novel Writing Month which happens in November) or seeing a wild-flung idea/plot from some obscure news article or tidbit discovered while surfing the internet.  Also, I might have to control my imagination when watching certain TV shows - like Aliens on the History channel or of that ilk. National Geographic and History channel can be great idea generators.  I can't give up Giorgio Tsoukalos, Erich von Daniken, David Childress, Peter Fiebag, Robert Bauval and Luc Burgin. Nor can I give up the SyFy channel.  I'll just have to control (aka lock down) my imagination.

I figure if I can finish, edit and publish at least two (2) books a year - it will take me a mere thirteen (13) years to finish all those I have lurking (aka languishing) on my laptop.  Even IF I were to be able to push myself to 3 books a year; it would still take over 8 years to finish them all. Exactly WHERE did I think one or two years would be sufficient?

Can I control my imagination to not... repeat, NOT want to write something new for the next ten years?

At the current time, I am open to any and all suggestions of how to complete the task at hand.

Uh, so you have a "basic" understanding of what I've got stuffed in my laptop --

5 Amish novels, one is a horror, the rest Christian and sort of a series
5 vampire novels (a series)
4 fantasy novels (a series)
2 action adventure novels (1 is a sequel to a published book)
3 epic fantasy novels
1 Native American werewolf vampire detective story
1 Native American fantasy
1 mainstream fiction
1 historical fiction
1 military fantasy
1 SF novel
1 fairy fantasy

As you can see, a very eclectic selection of stories. Oh, and the short stories are a collage of SF, horror, and fantasy... and we have NO count on those.

Is this the time I should mention, I have one "screenplay" I also have in the works and not part of the counts above?

HELP ME!

Until next I ramble on...

Multi-Tasking

I started teaching this week.  What am I teaching?  Writing, of course.  I'm doing a 7 week course I created called "Sailing The Seven Cs" which is based on my segment of a how-to writing book.

I arrived at the college early so I could discuss another project with the department head and make sure I had enough time for lunch before my 1pm class.

Okay, I arrived early and she was in another class.  As I sat in the lounge, I was able to watch other students.  That's when I say the latest (at least for me) in multi-tasking.

The young man had a small electronic notepad, Kindle or iPad and was watching the news on it. At the same time, he had another smaller electronic device he was playing a game on. He also had a set of earbuds and I thought he was listening to the game.  I was wrong.  I heard a cellphone ring and he pulled it out of his pocket which had the cord to the earbuds. He yanked the earbuds out of his ears and I heard music - either rap or something with a heavy beat.  In my ignorance, I listen to rock and roll - basically 50s, 60s, 70s, and some 80s stuff, new age, classical, show tunes and country. I'm eclectic but just haven't gotten into rap or heavy metal and/or grunge.  Anyway, he started talking to somebody, grabbed the news playing unit and the screen changed to what appeared to be another news channel.  Just as quickly, he picked up an earbud, stuck it in his ear and immediately placed the other one on the speaker of his cellphone. "Listen to this!"  Again, it was music but I couldn't really make it out.

From what I could tell, the conversation between him and his friend revolved around the music he was listening to and the news.  AND, all during this time, he also continued to play the game while at the same time, involving another student who was sitting a nearby table into the news aspect.

Sorry, but this old guy's mind was blown.  How does one multi-task so many different things at once?

I was visiting my #4 son's house a while back and his 6 and 7 year old daughters were watching some show on TV.  I, for some reason, thought it to be an animated movie, like Veggie Tales or whatnot.

Again, WRONG!

It was Shopkins.  The segments are about 60 seconds, some shorter, some longer, and then it is over and a new segment comes on.

We say our children don't stay focused on one thing for any length of time. As an adult (parent) have you watched what they watch?  Just because it is a "children's" station or show, doesn't mean that it is automatically the best thing to watch.

Years ago, I was home sick and was helping my wife watch the first our grandchildren. They wanted to watch their TV shows.  My wife put them on.  I was amazed at the shortness of the scenes and the variance of each scene. I just sat there shaking my head in disbelief.

On the way to work the next day, the passenger riding next to me got up to leave and asked if I'd like to read the magazine, otherwise she would toss it.  I agreed to read it.  Inside was an article that explained how children's TV shows today are designed to keep their interest and to keep them from wandering away from the TV.

HUH?

Short scenes, voice changes, lighting variances - everything plays to the child to keep his mind occupied.  In order to do that, everything is a short burst. The child won't leave the TV for fear of missing something.

Think about that!!

You go to the theater and during the movie, you want popcorn or a drink - you get up, hurry to get whatever and race back to your seat. You might miss something but more than likely, not too much and can quickly pick up the flow.

Not so with a children's TV show. By the time they've toddled to the other side of the room, they could have missed a whole episode - hence they stay put.

Is this part of the multi-tasking that I saw at college last week?  Are the young children growing up in a world where everything must happen in 30 seconds, no more than 60 seconds or lose their interest?

When I was a child, I'd sit under a big tree and listen to the wind blow through the leaves or watch the wind play atop the fields of golden wheat - mesmerized for great lengths of time.  Today when I attempt to show this to my grandchildren, it is a quick glance followed by "That's nice" and they move on.  I could read a phrase in a book and get lost in the reverie as I pondered its meaning and how it made me feel. It could be a couple of minutes, even five or ten minutes, maybe longer.

I consider myself multi-tasking when I write, listen to music, stare out the window from time to time and sometimes chew gum.  But, watching the news, playing a game, listening to music and talking to a friend on the phone and the guy at the next table?  That is taking multi-tasking to a whole new height.

Until next I ramble on...

Eggs! And More...

To paraphrase Scotty from Star Trek IV The Voyage Home:  Admiral, there be eggs here!

Finally, after several months of watching my chicks grow and mature, I proceeded to the chicken coop to feed and water - my daily routine - and was surprised to discover an egg scurried in the corner on the floor.

Uh, that was about 2 to 3 weeks earlier than I'd been told to expect eggs.  Almost everyone had told me not to expect any eggs until sometime in July. Well...

WRONG!!

It was the cutest little egg.  All brown and smooth.  But, oh, so small.  About 1/2 the size of a normal egg.  Still, one of my 18 chickens decided to give me an egg.  I proudly carried it into the house and presented it to my wife.  She was ecstatic.

Now, one must remember, she was the one who wanted to have chickens.  I wanted to raise about 25 for butchering and stocking the freezer.  She wanted eggs.  I have been the one who goes out every day to feed and water the hens.  Uh, not her.  Also, I don't eat eggs because they make me sulfuric and you don't want me like that - trust me, but that's another story.

Since the first egg's discovery, my wife is more involved with the chickens.  Well, sort of. Okay, she only goes out (about 2 or 3 times a day) to check for more eggs.  I'm the guy who still has to feed and water the chickens... oh, and clean out the coop, etc.

With the egg discovery, my #1 son made us 4 nesting boxes.  I've put some straw in them.  The hens use the boxes for roosting at night, throw out the straw, and continue to lay their eggs on the floor AND NOW, even outside on the ground.  I am going to paint some plastic eggs tan and put them in the boxes to see if that helps.  If not, I will lock them in the coop temporarily in an attempt to get them to lay the eggs inside, at least. Hopefully, at some point, they'll realize they have nests.

It looks so lonely, all by itself on the counter for the picture.

This is what it appears in size against a regular-sized egg.

Also, so you know it, there have been more eggs laid since the first one appeared.  We have a total of nine eggs now.  My wife, in her modest brainstorm, has been saving all the used egg cartons for this adventure - much to my surprise.  In fact, I think she has all the kids saving them, too.  She has a huge stack of empty egg cartons.  But, here is what the eggs in a carton look like...

The darker ones are from the Red Cross hens, the two lighter ones are from the ISA Brown hens. As the hens mature and continue laying eggs, they will get larger. I'm told all the lighter eggs will get darker with time and size.

There are 18 hens.  Egg production should increase with time, as well as size.  Right now, we're getting about 1 or 2 eggs per day.  As stated, I don't eat eggs but do look forward to a lot more angel food cakes to munch on.

In other news, my garden is coming along well.  The peas have really done well and the vines are loaded with pea pods.  My wife figures she will have to consider ambling out to harvest them.  I can't believe we only have about 2 cups of frozen peas left from last year.  I'll probably use them in the next week or two.  By that time, I would say the new peas should be coming in.  Mmm.  Fresh peas in a cream sauce over new baby potatoes.  YUM!

My tomato plants are doing well, growing strong in their wire cages.  Can't wait to make this year's salsa.  I only have 1 qt of salsa left.  My garlic and onions are coming along.  Two days ago I put up the lines for the pole beans to grow on.  Amazing how fast they latched onto the lines and started growing up them.  I'm sort of excited to see how the fish line trellis works this year.  I've always used the tee pee pole method and my loving wife wanted something a little easier to deal with.  We'll see.

The flowers I started are coming along beautifully.  The orange petunias aren't quite the exciting, electric shade as shown in the magazine.  Still, they are pretty, but not so much orange right now, as more coral-colored.  They look good against the white petunias, purple sweet alyssum and lime-green sweet potato vines.

Has anyone ever attempted to grow that large foliage plant, Elephant Ears? See picture.

I've got 3 bulbs that I've planted. It has been 3 weeks now and so far, nada.  Last year I bought a package of 5, planted them in a moist, but not soggy, area, with shade and sun.  My granddaughters, 4 of them, helped and there was one for each of them, plus mine.  None of them grew.  I figured it was something I'd done wrong... or the ground wasn't good.  This time I bought another 5, gave 2 away, and planted the 3 in huge pots, hoping for a fabulous tropical look.  So far, I'm disappointed.  I planted them as shown on the instructions - uh, all the dirt basically washed away in the first rain, leaving the tops exposed.  I figured that was what it was supposed to do.  I'm probably wrong. HELP!

To finish up, a little health update.  My dietitian has me on an 1800 calorie diet with 40-60 carbs per meal and 15-30 carbs per snack.  I gained weight.  NOT GOOD.  She wanted me to have an intake, at minimum, 165 carbs, preferably closer to the high end at 270.  Yeah, I gained weight.  Went to the doctor and explained the circumstances and he agreed, I should go back to my diet, lose the weight and see if we can get me off a lot of these diabetic medicines.  So, I'm now eating small meals, about 4 a day, cutting out carbs but not completely, and, of course, exercising.  I've cut out the biggie carb monsters: rice and potatoes; plus I've given up pop.  Okay, I cheat. I have ONE diet pop at night along with a bowl of popcorn.  Sorry, but I was born in Iowa, the corn state, and I love my corn, especially popcorn.  I use a dribble of oil in a microwave popcorn popper just so the small amount of salt I put on - stays on. LOL.  Of course, I'm consuming more veggies, fresh and raw veggies, not from cans.  Plus, now that fruit is once again in season, I'm checking those out.  My sugar was up a tad when I went to the doctor, but with the new meds (got rid of Januvia, now on Victoza) and new diet, I'm seeing the numbers come back down and that's what I want to see. Yes, I know. Victoza is an injection and I fought to avoid this, but it is NOT insulin. The doctor assured me if I can get my weight down, more than likely the sugar will also come down and I can stop Victoza. It better!

Finally, I'm writing again.  Back to my sequel for "The Secret Voice."  I now have Daniel Yoder, my Amish character, in New York City.  He is following a dream, testing Rumshpringe.  I can't believe the trouble he has found himself in, plus I know a few little secrets that should keep him off-balance and the reader turning pages.  More about "The New York Voice" as time passes.

Until next I ramble on...

The Bobs Update

And now for some updates from Bob - The Farmer, The Cook, The Writer, The Grandpa, The Traveler and The One Who Wants to be Healthy...

The chicken coop is complete and the chickens have been transferred to the new enclosure. Of course, they weren't too happy with the idea of being moved but now, with the chicken run available, I think they're getting acclimated to the new home.

Yes, the younger ones are still terrified and intimated by the larger hens but when the 8 brown hens go out into the yard, the little brown and white ones run wild in the coop, eating and drinking.

Sure, go ahead and think I'm crazy. Every time the little ones attempt or think of coming out of the coop, one of the crazy (what my sons call her) hens goes flying up in their face, pushing them back into the coop.  At least it has been that way for the last two day.

Tonight! Tonight was a day of liberation for the little ones. One of them (I think it is the one my granddaughter named "Snow") strolled out onto the ramp. The crazy hen came fluttering up and it just jumped down into the yard. Shortly thereafter, two more joined the first one.  So, in the end, there was five little ones out in the yard with the eight bigger hens.  That means that there were still five more little hens inside plus two very BIG meat chickens.  Those two are so huge they can barely walk and - sorry, folks, but they will be butchered this week.

The remaining eighteen hens will be allowed to mature to lay eggs... which should start maybe in late June or mid-July.  When all eighteen start laying, the possibility of eighteen eggs a day is a fact, BUT, more than likely, it will be more like about twelve to fifteen eggs a day.  Still, seven to ten dozen eggs per week is more than I can use.  Notice I didn't say eat.  Plain eggs or heavy egg items and I don't get along. Fried eggs, hard/soft boiled eggs, eggnog, even eggs in potato salad - I become sulfuric - and trust me, you don't want to be around.

So, as my neighbor stated, get that sign-up and out there when eggs are available and he'll be over to get farm-fresh eggs.  He said I'll have a thriving egg business in no time.  He was checking out my coop and said I may want to enlarge the chicken area and cut back my shed share of the building.  He thinks I should up the ante to about thirty hens. Hm? Maybe he likes eggs?

Also, as Farmer Bob, my plants I started inside are coming along fantastically. My tomato plants are growing even larger and I will probably need to transplant them to five-inch pots this coming week. The geraniums are getting big, as are the petunias and impatiens... but I think I may be able to keep the last two in the current pots, the geraniums might need bigger pots.

Yesterday I planted two rows of peas out in the garden. Hopefully, they will do better this year than they did last year, but still, last year was really nice.  I mean, a full gallon of peas to freeze. I don't know how many of you are familiar with "Tater Tot Casserole" but those fresh frozen peas tasted absolutely wonderful in the casseroles during the winter. Here's a quick recipe from Cooking Bob:

1 lb ground beef, 1 can cream of mushroom soup (or celery or chicken), 2 cups frozen peas, cheese slices (cheddar or Colby) and a bag of frozen tater tots.  We do NOT cook the beef prior.

Set oven to temperature for tater tots - usually about 400.
1) Spread the beef thinly on bottom of 9x12 pan.
2) Spread soup across the beef (do NOT add water)
3) Spread frozen peas on top of soup
4) Put slices of cheese to cover entire pan
5) Place tater tots in a layer. (my sons line them up for easy cutting, but...)
6) Bake as directed for tater tots, about 30-35 mins.
7) Cut and serve.
NOTE: Use a clear glass dish the first time so you can see if the meat has cooked properly. Some people prefer to crumble and fry the beef with diced onions prior to layering - your option.

Now, as Writer Bob, it has been very good the last couple of weeks. My latest book, "At Death's Doors" has done well on Amazon. Sales skyrocketed at its initial release sending my book into Amazon's top 100.  Writer Bob has really been busy this past week working on an old novel, rewriting "The Treasure Within" which is more of a literary work than my usual fantasy or horror genre. I've been making myself accountable to another author friend for word counts. LOL. And she has been making herself accountable to me for her word counts.  Great incentive, eh?

And Grandpa Bob had a fabulous time last weekend celebrating three birthdays: one granddaughter, Keeley, turned 6 while her sibling twins, Jaxson and Mikayla, turned one. It was a fun party because, as Grandpa, I got to see ALL my grandkids and a lot of their friends. Party! Party! Party!

Now, for Health Bob - not so good. I can't seem to lose any weight. And my sugar has been all over the place.  I'm trying to get it all under control.  Maybe I just need to toss out what the doctor and dietitian want me to eat and go back to my diet I was on back in December which dropped my A1C from 10.3 to 7.2 and my weight from 268 to 240.  The diet they have me on, I now weight 251  HUH?  What part of losing weight and blood sugar control don't they understand?

Trying something new - I was told to be interactive with my audience. So, now I will ask you a simple question.  Not everyone is a writer, nor a farmer, nor grandparent, or a health expert. So exactly what kind of question can I ask that everyone can participate with?

You're going on a simple trip, call it a day trip. Where would you go? What would you see? Why would it be fun? And how much would it cost?

Does that sound like a silly question?  Not really.  My wife and I like to travel and sometimes we miss those little "secret" places that only the locals know about.  We've stumbled onto a few of them, especially one in Iowa, one in New York on Long Island, a few up in Michigan, a couple over in Indiana, and some in Ohio. Well, actually I wish I could remember the one in California and the other in -- I think -- Arizona? It can be a campground, a scenic view, a landmark, whatever.

So, tell Bob The Traveler about your favorite hideaway.

Until next I ramble on...

Aw, Crap!

Even the best laid plans go awry.  Oh, how true.

I am attempting to get a chicken coop built.  Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, has gone right.  The weather was beautiful and we started the project by getting the platform and some of the wood. We covered it and it has been covered more than uncovered.  My boys can only work on it during the weekends and they are limited weekends due to their jobs.  So we've had two great weekends, one they were able to get a little work done, the other they had to do mandatory overtime. Almost every other weekend has been crappy.  This weekend was no different - okay, a little different. A mere fifty miles away in Toledo, they got over six (6) inches of snow!!  We got about two (2) inches mixed with ice.  Whoo-hoo?  To finish the coop, we need to finalize the roof with shingles and finish the north wall and add one more stud to that north wall to match the south wall so we can put in a retainer wall to keep the chickens on one side and I get to have a small storage shed on the other side.  PLUS, I have to build an outdoor enclosure which needs to be all protective.  It will be a hoop-type enclosure with fencing going over the hoop and across the bottom on the floor so any invasive critters can't get to my chickens.  We have eagles from the top, and cats, foxes, opossums, skunks, stray dogs and yes, even coyotes in the area.  I've even heard a bobcat with tracks in my backyard and rumors have it that there is a cougar and bear that roam the outlands where I live - although I haven't seen them - YET.  The joke around here at the current time is:  The hens will be laying eggs before the coop is done.  Just so you understand the joke - it takes a chick to an egg-laying hen - about 5 months.  Jeesh! I hope my coop gets done before that!!

I wanted to plant my peas in the garden.  My hope was this coming week.  Obviously, with the snow and ice this weekend, my plans are going to be delayed a tad.  In fact, my hope to weed and cultivate the garden is being delayed with all the rain we've had of late.  About the time the ground gets perfect for me to work it, it rains... or snows!

Farmer Bob is getting frustrated... need I say more?

Traveling Bob wants to work on his RV, but again, the weather has not cooperated.  Who wants to go outside and work in a cold RV.  I mean, the temps have been freezing.  Yes, I could "heat" the RV but why should I do that?  April is supposed to be a nice month.  Remember?  March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb.  April brings May flowers.  March sucked and so far, April seems like a "Ground Hog Day" rerun of March.  Come on warm weather!!

Writing Bob released a new book. Finally!  The collection of stories has been released.  Yes, the one which I had you help me decide the cover.  It did great the first few days out - reaching #35 in anthologies and even up to position 52K on Amazon.  If you're curious about this book...

http://amzn.to/25HQinV

I was asked just how scary the book was. Hm? It is not a blood, guts and gore type collection. I tend to write more "light" horror - I like to play with your mind, the psychological horror. Somebody told me it was more "Twilight Zone" type stories.  Whatever.  It deals with death and its myriad aspects, so it don't fall under the romance, western or Christian genres!

Oh, while I'm discussing crappy.  I went to the doctor and dietitian this past week. Hm? They weren't upset by my almost ten (10) pound gain.  Hey!  I was!!  Seems I'd given in to despair and given up my diet.  Too many all-you-can-eat buffets and not watching what I was eating, including all those fabulous Lent fish frys.  I'm not Catholic but I love fish frys and look so forward to the Lenten season splurge of local fish frys at almost every organization.  Especially those which offer all-you-can-eat fish!  So, there are repercussions to eating like this - and I gained almost 10 pounds.  Now I need to get back on the bandwagon and be assertive in my goal to lose some weight.  Due to the weight-gain I've noticed my blood sugar increase.  Everything is interrelated.  So I lose weight, my blood sugar will come down and with a little luck, I'll begin the spiral back up to a healthy body instead of the horrible spiral down into oblivion of fat despair.

On an up note - last weekend I had my #1, #2 and #4 sons and their families to visit me and we had a lot of fun.  I enjoyed the antics of my grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  The 6 yr olds kept wanting to play outside, eventho it was close to freezing but sunny.  The twins who are just learning to walk kept getting into everything and who can ignore their smiles and get upset?  The great-grandkids are still learning to sit up and attempt to crawl.  But they don't crawl - YET.

This weekend I had my #1, #2 and #3 sons and their families to vist.  The older granddaughters were a lot of fun to tease - 14 and 10.  And they had a blast in the kitchen with grandma learning how to make different things.  Let me tell you this - the drop biscuits were absolutely fantastic and they did them with grandma only giving directions.  Plus they helped me with my Farmer Bob chores, feeding and watering the chickens.  They started to name the hens - the egg-laying ones.  I told them they shouldn't but if they were naming, only name the brown chickens.  They only named a couple. Whew!  I don't want anyone making pets of these chickens.  At some point, the chickens might become nuggets and well, I don't want upset grandkids.

In case you're wondering - sons #1 and #2 live in the immediate area.  Sons #3 and #4 live in the Detroit area - about 2 hours away and all of them have jobs where they work with mandatory overtime and/or weekends.  We're always happy to see them visit.  LOL.  I love making a 7plus pound meatloaf - that is 2 pounds of ground beef, 2 pounds of sausage and 3 pounds of venison.  Now add the rest of the ingredients - over 7 pounds.  YUM! They LOVE meatloaf.

Until next I ramble on...

SO, Who Are You?

This past week I was asked an interesting question.

Who are you?  What makes you so special and sets you aside from others?

My first mental response was - I'm a writer.  I blurted it.  Yes, I said it aloud. There was no take-backs, no side-stepping my answer.

The response from my verbal attacker caught me ill prepared.  Well, whoop-de-doo! There are other writers, you're not the only one. They could have stopped at that point, but they continued. "And some of them write better than you! So, again, what makes you so special?"

Okay, I had to do some fast mental straining of the few working cells I had left. This person wasn't going to be put off so easily and/or so quickly.

I'm a husband to a wonderful wife.  You're not the only guy to wear a wedding ring, dude.

I'm a father of four sons.  There are other fathers out there, that's no big whoop!

I'm a grandfather to ten wonderful children. Again, there are other grandfathers with great children.

I'm a great-grandfather to two children plus a set of twins on the way. Yeah, big whoop! Try again.

I'm a Christian.  I'm retired.  I served my country in the Navy.  I garden.. I travel... I... I... I...

What DOES make me special? What designates me as special and not to be confused with my neighbor or friend?

Somebody said how I appear makes me unique. Unfortunately, that doesn't hold water, either.  I've met my doppelganger and it was a really weird experience.  I was in the Navy and was being waved at and spoken to by total strangers who acted like they knew me. It was a person from my barracks who started me on the path to discovery of my look-alike. He'd seen me at a bar in Fresno, CA and I ignored him. I was able to prove I wasn't at the bar - 1) I wasn't quite old enough at the time and 2) I had 3 buddies who I'd went to the theater with that night and played cards with until 1 AM.  Then this mystery person strolled into the mess hall while I was there. He was almost a year older than me and, for all practical purposes, the spitting image of me. But, I digress.  So much for looks.

After an immense amount of thought on the question, I could only come up with one answer.

It is the combination of all these things that make me the unique person I am. It is my likes and dislikes which I have the right to change as often as I desire. It is my looks, which I can change, and, of course, my heritage which I can't. It is my ancestors and my descendants. It is my accomplishments, my failures, and my dreams.

There is no one individual item that makes me unique. I can only think of one man to have lived and have one attribute to set him from others and that would be Jesus who died on the cross for our sins.

For many Christians, this week is considered a Holy Week to commemorate the final trials, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Take the time this coming Easter Sunday to attend church and celebrate his defeat of Death.  For those who aren't of the Christian persuasion - may I ask you attend the worship center of your choice and recommit yourself to your faith.

Until next I ramble on...

Farmer Bob

Even the best-laid plans go astray!!

I have been planning and discussing the idea of chickens and eggs with my wife over the last few years and finally, this year, I decided to do something about it.  I even got my sons involved and they have the wood to make me a shed/chicken coop.  After several "talks" with my lovely bride, we decided that six chickens would be the best number, giving us the eggs we need and extras, too.

We were going to get them on Weds morning with a trip to Angola to Rural King for the chicks and necessary equipment AND a little side trip to a couple of other stores for some things we thought we might want but didn't really need.. We awoke to a snowstorm and decided that two old farts didn't need to be out on the highways in that kind of weather.  So it was delayed to Thursday.

Thursday came and our #3 son called needing some help and could we come to the Detroit area.  We said, weather permitting.  So we headed to Detroit on Thursday with hopes of getting our chicks on Friday.  That idea quickly dissipated when we realized we would be staying overnight and probably not be getting home until late on Friday night.

Our #4 son called to let us know he was coming to visit over the weekend. He had no idea what I had in plan for him! LOL.

Saturday morning, my #4 son in tow along with two of his daughters, my granddaughters, Zora and Keeley, ages 6 and 5, we headed to Rural King in Angola, Indiana.

I was informed I needed to buy EIGHT chicks, one for each of the younger grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  HUH?  I was buying egg layers, I wasn't buying pets!!  My lovely wife instructed me to get one chick for each of the grandchildren - Hailey, Cora, Zora, Keeley, Jaxson and Makayla plus the great-grandchildren, Gracie and Easton.  Guess I was buying pets that also laid eggs!

Okay, not my original plan but something doable.  Hey!  I was getting my chicks!!!

Here they are:

3 of the 8 chickens

5 of the 8 chickens

All 8 huddled together

The last picture does have all eight chicks in the picture. There is one hidden at the very top, getting a drink - you can just see her butt.  Yes, her.  These are all pullets - hens.  No roosters.  These will be our egg producers.

Actually, I call the last picture - Everyone in the pool since they all went scurrying up to the water tank when I stuck the camera in to take a picture.  They are currently "homed" in a 55 gal aquarium that once was a turtle habitat.  I figure that the current residence will be good for at least two weeks, maybe even three.  Hopefully, by then, the coop will be a reality, otherwise, I will need to figure out something else until the coop is built.

BTW, two of them already have names.  I didn't plan on naming them but since Zora and Keeley went along, one is named Emily, another is Hannah.  Don't ask me which one is who, I don't want to get to friendly with my future food.  Yes, food, at some point, but not pets.  No pets!!

They will soon be visited by their cousins - another 25 chicks I will be buying for butchering after raising them for 8 weeks.  If that works, my wife says we may consider another 25 to definitely fill the freezer for the winter.

ALSO, I will be getting two tom turkeys to raise.  Then again, we might up the ante on them to 3 or 4.  I mean, turkey is good.  My nephew raised one several years ago.  Come Thanksgiving, it dressed out over 32 pounds and was soooo delicious.  I'll be happy if they are 25 pounds when it comes time to butcher.  

Well, this is Farmer Bob signing off...

Until next I ramble on...

Year End Round-Up

What did 2015 do for you?  It is the end of another year and, as always, we tend to get a little whispy-eyed with memories of the last 12 months.

This year had it ups and downs.  There were good things and there were bad things.  Of course, we all remember those incidences which just happened... like my mother-in-law passing just prior to Christmas.  That was definitely a down thing but you can spin it as an up thing: She was 103 and had lived a very full life.  Her health had been failing, along with her memory - and that hurt, especially my wife who visited her several times a week.  It's hard when your mother doesn't remember who you are - but, she knows you, just not your name.

Of course, there was my doctor visit in November which wasn't all that great.  My blood sugar was averaging 246 for the last six months and he basically told me, fix it or die.  Again, to spin a good thing to it, I have since lost 18 pounds and my sugar has been hovering around the 100-120 mark.  That is a very good thing.  I'll be going back in January for another blood draw to see what the new results will be.  I'm hoping to lose another few pounds in the meantime.

While on the subject of weight, I'll go clear back to the beginning of the year when I was making resolutions.  What were they?  Lose 25 pounds. Publish 3 books.  So let's see what I did.

Back in June I got so sick I could barely swallow.  I lost weight - a lot of weight.  I lost a total of over 30 pounds.  Then I got well.  I found them.  I didn't have to go that far to search, either.  They were ever so quick to return - and return they did.  Okay, I didn't get them ALL back.  I was able to let some free to roam and find another home.  About 10 pounds were left on the range.  So with the doctor's colorful health report, I've lost almost another 20 pounds, so, in total, I've lost almost 30 pounds this year.  THAT I call a success.  I reached my goal of 25 pounds.  Oh, for you readers, if you find these stray pounds, their yours to keep - call it my gift, if you will.  I don't want them back so they're free for the keeping.  I'm sure they'll be good to keep you warm - not healthy, but good.

Now, to the publishing.  In April I published "The Secret Voice" which has been a great seller.  I have had to order it twice from Amazon to keep it in stock.  I even sold a copy to the young lady who helped me at WalMart when I created my new poster of the cover.  My one classmate also works there and she's been telling everyone about and well, do you have any idea what it is like to have a clerk ask if she can buy a copy?  If you go to Amazon, it doesn't look like it is selling because all the copies I sell don't reflect... and I've sold a LOT of copies.

Anyway, I published that book and was able to finally get my 2nd book published yesterday and should be available now.  "CRACKED! The Writing Mystique" is a short how-to about handling the different aspects (mystiques) of writing including character detail, active/passive voice, writing sex and so much more.  As always, I made sure to include examples so it could be easily understood.

Did I publish three books?  No.  I really feel ashamed.  I could have done so easily but I didn't and there absolutely no excuse.  Of course, I've been working on the sequel to "The Secret Voice" and, as many writers will understand, my mind has been attacked by several other plots and stories that are screaming for attention. I was just busy with other things - like family and life, I guess.

Of course, this year, my wife and I tried to do a little more camping.  Of course, with her mother's health, we didn't want to travel too far away.  Most of the time we went to the local state park just a few miles up the road and would camp there for the week, skipping out Friday morning before it got too crowded.  We did do a trip up into Michigan with our middle granddaughters (ages 13 and 9) where we got in some great fishing.  That was about 5 hours from home... not too far, but away.

My garden.  It was a good garden.  I even was able to grow some sweet corn and it was delicious. My wife canned some tomatoes, making stewed, diced, juice and even several jars of salsa which I have pretty well decimated already.  She agrees - more salsa next year.  Yes, I have already received what I call the best fiction mags of the year - the garden seed catalogs.  And, yes, I already have delusions, uh, I mean, dreams of things I want to attempt to grow this coming year.  Since I was so busy doing mulch to certain areas, I am going to have to be a little more selective in what I want to grow in containers.  I have plans for a couple of tubs.  Of course, my two hanging deck boxes I have to allocate some nice draping plants.  And the step planters, those big 24-inch pots will need some color, too.  In just a few short months I'll be starting my garden seeds likes tomatoes, peppers and just not sure what else as of now.

Also, this coming year, I want to attempt raising some chickens - about 50 for slaughter and another 5 or 6 for eggs during the summer and fall.  Of course, if winter next year is anything like it has been so far this year, those chickens might make it through the winter.  Oh, and I'd like to also raise about 2, maybe 3 turkeys.  Living in the countryside does have its perks but then again, it also has the critters that like chickens and turkeys, especially the young ones... oh, and eggs, too!

So, as you can see, I'm already getting around to my New Years Resolutions for 2016.  I'll keep it simple.  Lose another 25 pounds.  Publish at least 2 books.  Raise some chickens and turkeys.  Grow a garden.  Travel, camp and fish more.  Oh, and spend more time with my wife, kids, grandkids, great grandkids, family and friends.

Until next I ramble on...

I'm Back.

I know I've been remiss in doing my weekly blog but I had to take care of a few things and to be quite honest, I just didn't feel I could be fair to my readership.  Here's a little of what has happened in the interim...

1) NaNoWriMo.  Yes, I attempted and succeeded once again with this program.  This year I couldn't decide if I wanted to slap-write my 2nd Amish novel or do the writing book that was buzzing around in my head.  A friend suggested both.  That's what I did.  I accomplished over 52k words by the end of the month, completing my writing book and actually accomplishing quite a bit on my Amish novel.  So, hang in there, I've got some books coming out soon.  More later...

2) Health.  Remember my New Year's resolutions to lose some weight - okay, at least 25 pounds?  I actually accomplished that back in June, losing almost 30.  I got so sick, I couldn't eat and basically was on a liquid diet.  Yeah, I lost weight.  But to be honest, it just lingered around the corner and when I wasn't looking, most of it jumped back on board.  Not good.  I went to my doctor back in November and well, he tried to sugar-coat the results of my latest blood test.  "Get your diabetes under control or die."  WOW!  He said he couldn't sugar coat it because I'm a diabetic, which is true for the last 15 years.  Seems my A1C went from a not-so-great 7.3 to a Holy Crap! 10.4.  For those not in the know, an A1C in the range of 4.5 to 5.9 is consider good.  My diabetes was totally out of control with high blood results averaging 243 for the past 6 months.  I have since taken active steps to correct the situation.  He had changed my meds - I had him put me back on the old meds which were working.  Since then, my sugar has dropped drastically into more acceptable numbers.  I'm watching my food intake and exercising more.  My doctor said if I can get my sugar under 130 on a regular basis, he will be happy (and surprised!)  Last night, before supper, my sugar was 126.  I'm eating my healthier right now and from what I could tell - I went to the Medical Center with my wife and stopped at my doctor to get weighed in - my weight is down 6 pounds in one week.  I will allow a little variance since it wasn't the same scale, but still, those scales are checked often throughout the year - so there shouldn't be too much change.  But, we'll keep tabs on it.

3) I mentioned publishing a book back in item #1.  That's right, hopefully, sometime this coming week, I will release "CRACKED! The Writing Mystique" which is a book to help a new writer understand some of the secrets of good writing and aide those seasoned writers with their writing.  I figure the e-book will be released at $.99 - at least for a few days.  There will be the paperback but I'm unsure exactly how much it will be since I need to have CreateSpace calculate all the expenses. My New Year's resolution goal was to publish 3 books - I got two books out with this one.  Hmm?  Last year I wanted to publish 4 books and only got out 3, so this year I decided on 3 and only got out 2 books.  Maybe next year I should consider 11 books and publish 10.  Whoo-hoo!!

4) On the home front, I was able to get a lot of landscaping done before the winter chills came in. We had this home built in 2006 and now, finally, after almost 10 years, I have a sidewalk to be somewhat proud of.  Prior, it was some mud, grass, a couple of rubber mats and a short length of carpet remnant.  Now it is an attractive angled walk of bricks with an edging of mulch.  In fact, there is matching mulch in front of the low brick wall and a large expanse of ground (heavy clay) that wouldn't even grow weeds. Oh, and the angled ground which had irises and day lilies, it is now a lovely stretch of mulch.  I will be guarding it against weeds with a self-made concoction of weed-killer including dish soap and vinegar plus some other stuff.  It's not as harsh as RoundUp and therefore will take quite a few hits to finally exhaust the plant's growth and kill it.  Still, if it gets on my good plants, it won't kill them and I can spray with water to rinse it off.  Not so with RoundUp.

5) Hoarding. We've all seen those shows were people hoard and hoard. My wife and I have started to hoard, too.  Slightly different.  The local grocery had 8 weeks of specials where you could get certain items at a very low price in limited quantities.  We also had a couple of friends who got those mailers and didn't want the items.  Guess who got them?  Then they decided to also have a 10 for $10 sale and other amounts.  Imagine - 10 1 pound packages of Butterball turkey bacon for $10.  Around here, that stuff usually sells for the cheap side at $3.99/pkg.  Need I say we bulked up?  They had 80/20 hamburger for $1.99/lb.  Yup!  We bought in 3+ lb packages and re-packaged into 1 lb bags and put it in the freezer.  They had all sorts of stuff on sale and we bought and bought to stock up.  Our big freezer is packed and the smaller one is also full.  We did a lot of canning and freezing of our garden goodies, too.  I kid you not, we can eat very well for the next 2 or 3 months and not leave the house except for milk which we don't drink that much of, anyway.  Oh, I forgot to mention, my grandson hunts and has gotten 2 deer so far this year.  He can only get one more.  The 2nd deer is still being processed and I have NO idea where we will put it.  What's nice, I can take a little venison and some of that 80/20 hamburger and get a very lean mixture which is even better for me.

6) Weather-wise - I'm not going to complain one bit.  I'm basically still running around outside in shorts and t-shirts in NW Ohio.  Okay, when I go into town, I put on bluejeans and sometimes a light jacket.  There has been only a couple of days that I've actually had to put on my leather jacket because it was so cold.  My wife, on the other hand, thinks it is chilly - but then again, I'm the guy who runs around in shorts all winter in the house, putting on a shirt when company comes. LOL.  I can handle extremes of heat and cold.  I'll be honest, I prefer 70 for a temperature year round but we keep our house a little warmer if we use air-conditioning - meaning it is too hot outside with no breeze and the windows can't be open.  In the winter, we keep it a little cooler, about 68.  Just had a thought!  Maybe that's why we don't get a lot of company. LOL.  Just kidding, this house should have a revolving door for the way people come and go here with 4 sons and 10 grandchildren, 4 of which are on their own, some with families.  It's a mob when the family gathers here.

Hopefully things will get better in my life.  I intend to get my blog out in a timely manner each week and, once again, I apologize for my absence.

Until next I ramble on...
















2.

School Fund Raising

It is every grandparent's nightmare.  The start of school and the few months before Christmas when every school in the nation seems to take on a plethora of fund-raisers.

If your grandchild is active in school, the typical grandparents will dole out the dollars to make little Billy or Beth Ann a proud child.

How?  You dare to ask?

Simple.  I currently have only 2 granddaughters in middle school. The older four have graduated and the younger four haven't started... yet.  That's right, another four coming through the ranks and it isn't getting any cheaper.

My granddaughters are active.  They play sports.  They play band.  They belong to chorus.  Oh, and the older of the two just started high school and now is thinking of joining some clubs.

The band is selling stuff to raise money for something - aren't they always? The one sport's group is also actively hustling something to buy.  And I believe the chorus/music department is pushing something, too.

I'm diabetic.  There is only so much candy one can buy and the diabetic candy is even more expensive!  Oh, wait, they have non-sweet, not candy stuff to sell. So the diabetic can't get away.

Just what I need. Wrapping paper that costs more than the present itself.  Really?  I want to purchase three sheets of colorful "holiday" wrap that will bring joy to any child opening the present?  What?!! I spent $12 on those 3 sheets and they will "nicely" wrap 3 boxes, 15 X 3 X 10.  Huh?  So basically it will cover a standard shirt/blouse box.  I buy a nice t-shirt (on sale) for $2 and buy a box, another $.75 and then wrap it in a sheet of $4 "colorful holiday" wrap.

We live about 2 hours away from these grandchildren, so it isn't like they can "pop-over" to let grandma and grandpa check out the list.

No worries!!  You can now do it ONLINE!!

That's right.  Grandma went online and she found grandpa's favorite candy - candy corn.  She was able to get a whole pound for only - do you want to guess?  Only $12.  But wait!  There's shipping charges.  Of course, if you spend $50, shipping is free.  Uh, another word synonymous with grandparent is retired and with retired is the ever-popular limited income.

Simple enough.  Just buy $25 from each girl and get the free shipping.  No!!  Each order is individual and the $50 is per child.  So grandma paid the shipping - another $8.75.

WHAT?!!!  Almost $21.  And I am now the proud owner of a cheap, clear glass container of one whole pound of candy corn - some have been dipped in chocolate.

Be still my heart.

It was delivered today.  I'm expecting the other box to come tomorrow.

Now for the truly sad part about this whole fiasco.

We ordered and the school will get its token amount - and it better be a goodly amount - but our granddaughters will get credit for the sales but it won't reflect on the scoreboard since only after the event is over and the sales have been finalized, will the final figures be revealed.  On the day the orders need to be turned in, some secretary is going to tally up each child's order form (key word here) and the one who sold the most will get the big prize at General Assembly the next day.  So much for Internet sales. Plus, the winner is always the person with the most relatives in the area.  My granddaughters have an uncle near them.  The rest of the family live 2+ hours away.

Personally, I would rather have just taken a ten (or a twenty since that is what it all added up to) out of my pocket for each girl and given it to the school directly.  Everyone would have been ahead.  I truly don't believe the school made $10 on my $12 order.  I certainly didn't need a pound of candy and it would have eliminated a lot of stress on my wife who spent too much time agonizing over all the possible items to select just the right one - in other words, the most for the cheapest price.

Be honest now.  When presented with the order form, it is Nature's mechanism kicking in to look at the full selection and then decide which item gives you the best bang for the buck.  It's only natural. We do it with any catalog.  We will select an item on desire THEN look at the price and decide to find another that is "less expensive" and close to what we want.

Before I forget - I commend those brave parents who take these order forms into work and covertly badger co-workers to buy.  When I worked in a factory, it was quite common to see several of these order forms either thumb-tacked to the bulletin board or discreetly sprawled across a lunch table.  Don't get me started on Girl Scout cookies since that seems to be the "get in your face" marketing ploy for sales.  Who can say no to Girl Scout mint cookies.  At pushing $4 a box, I'm learning how.

But, if you look at an order form, 90% of the time, at the top you'll find grandma and grandpa.  Mom and dad aren't at the top, they are at the very end of the list to make up the difference in the pseudo competition created to reach a certain level.

From mid-September until mid/late November, let the crazy fund-raising begin.

I wonder - will a school just accept a cash donation and get rid of this ridiculous thievery? The only ones who I feel are making out like bandits are the fund raising companies.  How much of that $12 I spent will the school receive?  Think about it.  IF I were to give $10 out of my wallet, I am going to bet I am giving them more than they get with all this fund raising.

Until next I ramble on...

What A Week

My buddy is retired and he is continually complaining to me about how bored he is.  How can that be since I now find my life even more hectic than when I worked.

This week is a perfect example...

Monday: Holiday celebrating Labor Day.  It should be a day of relaxing, enjoying the last of the sun fun and even getting a picnic in.  NOPE.  For me, it was my #1 son and family visiting and telling us about the cars they been looking at for their daughter since she wants a little bigger one with the baby coming.  So far, pretty normal.  He takes us to a dealership where they have a car that has piqued our curiosity — since my granddaughter doesn't want it and my son thinks it is a great car.

WOW!  It's a 2014 Ford Escape - hold on - brand new!!  Only 175 miles on it.  Seems it came in late last year, got shuffled to the back of the lot and only when somebody questioned the "mistype" on the inventory sheet did they discover it.  That's right.  The 2016s are already on the display floor and they have a brand new 2014 to sell.  They were practically giving it away.  My wife liked what she saw.

Step back a moment.  Remember me mentioning dealing on a new RV?  Yeah, that's never moved another step forward.  I'd sent 3 emails to the salesman stating I was interested and I received 3 emails stating that that particular email address didn't exist.  Hmm?  I went to the website. Yup, I had the correct domain name.  I had the salesman's business card.  I decided that if a person can't give me the right info, maybe I should step back.  Plus, he didn't want to take my old RV in as a trade.  No deal at that point on my behalf.  Yes, in my magnanimous heart, I gave up my RV for my wife's car.

Tuesday: The dealership opens at 9am, I arrive 9:30am — don't want to look too anxious.  A salesman comes out and putters around and finally ambles over to help us.  I tell him I'm interested in the 2014 for sale BUT before we go any further, can they apply the Ford family discount since my #4 son works for Ford.  He gave me a strange look and ushered into his office so he can find out.  The next thing, I'm out test-driving the vehicle.  My wife gets behind the wheel.  She is in love.  We get back, Nick (the salesman) is working out the figures and we decide to "go for it" and see what happens.  Just then, a couple I've seen wandering around the lot amble over and start checking it out.  A few minutes later, Nick comes in, the deal is done and we are buying a car.  He picks up the keys, aims it at the auto and VOILA!  The car is locked just as another couple amble towards it.  Another guy shows up at the door, Nick gives him the keys and a mere 2 hours later, we are walking out and my wife is driving the new car home.  Of course, we have to get something to eat and get the insurance company notified.  A quick visit to her brother after supper and the day is about over.

Wednesday: My grandson calls and asks if it is okay for them to start moving things into our house. So, it is official.  My grandson and his family will be living with us for a few months to help them out. Uh, that means we have to get the guest room cleaned out for them.  I guess I should mention that the big walk-in closet has been a playroom for our #4 son's two oldest daughters (6 and 5) plus a bedroom for whoever wanted to stay over.  We got to get it all moved over to the smaller bedroom which was our office and most recently, my wife's mother's room until she went to the nursing home.  So stuff had to be moved out of the office so the guest room could be moved.  We're talking total chaos and my wife and I have discovered, there has never been a need to do everything in a rush — there was always the next day to get things done.  They want to move furniture by Saturday.  HUH?  So we got hopping on that.

Thursday: The day is mostly spent on moving stuff either to our bedroom or from the guest room to the office (new guest room) or to the basement.  Whew!  The first boxes start to arrive.  The room is basically empty, just a few items remain to be addressed.  We decided we needed a break and since we wanted to go camping but with all the work to be done, we didn't go.  A little spin out to the campground to see how busy it is.  Very surprised by the number of campers.  Of course, we stopped and visited some friends and they joined us on the trip to the campground.

Friday: More stuff gets moved in and the first box of my TV order arrives.  The wall mount.  Sometime in the next 3 days, the 60 inch and 32 inch LED televisions will arrive. My wife needs a little help with the baby shower cake she is decorating.  Seems it is bigger than any board she has, so I have to find her a sheet of spare wood for the "owl" cake.  This is for my great grandson.  My granddaughter likes owls.  It just fit in the back of the Escape.  Whew!

Saturday: My #4 son and family arrive to visit for the weekend and go to the shower.  Yup!  I now have 6 adults and 5 children, ages 6 to just over a month old staying at my home.  Chaos?  Just a little but that's our family.  Oh wait, #1 son, his wife and daughter come over and #2 son, his wife and his daughter visit.  The only ones missing are #2's eldest son and my #3 son, his wife and 2 daughters. The grandson staying with us is #2's second son.  While the ladies are gone to the shower, the boys move the furniture in and then bring over a truckload of wood for a campfire.  I take the 2 granddaughters (6 and 5) over to a park for them to play and be out of the way.  We also go to the store and I get the makings for tacos.  Silly me —I thought 3 lbs of good ground beef would be enough.  Wrong!  We went through it quickly.  Next time, I use 4 lbs or if more family show, even more meat.  Fortunately, the garden was willing to offer up fresh tomatoes for the event. LOL. That night a great fire.

Sunday: Ignored the alarm and my wife - didn't get up until 11am so I missed church.  Guess it was too much excitement for me the day before. LOL.  Usual chaos as #4 and family got ready to head home and everyone else headed out, too.  You can only park 4 cars abreast in my driveway — and with my 2 cars, my grandson's 2 vehicles (car and truck), my #2 son coming on his motorcycle, his wife and daughter in their SUV, my #1 son in his truck and their daughter in her car and my #4 son in his SUV... it begins to look more like a car lot than a driveway.  Guess I should mention, my RV is up along the house, too, so when somebody decides to leave, it can get to be a tad interesting as to who has to move a vehicle. LOL.

But that's my week, and somehow, during that time, I was able to almost finish the edits on a client's book, get a chapter and a half of a new book written and watch a little television, too.

Until next I ramble on...