Monday, December 23, 2013

What Happens When...

You post something many will consider offensive in the wrong place?

I have two separate accounts on Facebook - one for my author stuff, the other for my personal things.  I attempt to keep the two completely apart.  In other words, my author account I try to keep professional and not clutter it with personal essays, rants, or other snarky items.

I failed.  Failed?  Oh, miserably.

Here's the link.

My wife read a post on her Facebook page about Duck Dynasty star, Phil Robertson.  Well, I got a little soapboxish about it.  Seems if somebody says something somebody else doesn't like, that show gets cancelled or the person removed. So I ranted.


I failed to accurately check to see what account I was on when I started my rant.  I thought I was on my personal account.  WRONG.  I was on my author account.

Now, several comments later, I discover the error of my ways.  It is too late to take corrective action.  I must now live with this mess on my author page, my professional page, where it flaunts my personal emotions to the world.

As I've stated, one should always keep personal and professional lives as far apart as possible.

Well, that theory and objective is now screwed.  Sure, I could delete it, but that's the coward's approach.

So, to make things short and sweet -- Why can't we all just get along. If you don't like purple, I guess I'll just have to learn to accept that. But, if I wear purple, you, the purple hater, must learn to deal with it, too.  It's all about give and take and personal likes and dislikes.  Unless your glass house is made of unbreakable panes, you'd best not be throwing stones at the others around you.

Plus, I'll be the first person to admit that I am far from perfect. I have flaws.  I make mistakes.  (If you even mention this to my wife, I will deny I said it!!)  Hell, some people think at times I'm a bigot, snob, a goody-goody-two-shoes, a pain and a jerk.  They also think I'm the nicest person they know, a friend, a confidant, buddy, and an all-around great guy goof-ball.

Sometimes you may not like what I post or have to say.  In my defense, I will tell you this --

You have your right to your opinion.  I may or may not like it.  Either way, I will defend your right to voice your opinion.  OPINIONS!  Not actions.  Slurring a black person is one thing -- burning a cross in their front yard or worse is action.  Voicing what you think of a gay lifestyle is an opinion, but denying them a proper burial or a chance of commitment of their lifestyle (marriage, insurance, etc) is not acceptable.

As I was taught many years ago: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never harm me.

It sounds quaint and simple but I also know that names can hurt and cut very deep.  But, over the years, I found I can walk away from name-callers.  To those who tend to get more assertive and aggressive, it isn't as easy to ignore.

As my parents taught me - Learn to pick your fights and just ignore name-calling - it will go away. Calling a person a name, yes it hurts, but it's only the first step in the escalation if you rise to the bait.

I was called a name, a name I despised. At first I reacted and from one kid calling me that, it was now three kids.  Finally I found the gumption to ignore their petty name calling.  It took about three months, but it tired for them since it no longer got a rise out of me. If I'd continued to fight, argue and bring attention to their actions, more would have joined them.

Opinions are nothing more than a fancy name for name calling.  If you don't make a fuss, it will quietly go away.

Yes, Phil made a comment.  People reacted, including me.  We should have ignored his remark and nobody would have been the wiser.  Do we blame Phil for making the comment or GQ for bringing it to the world's attention?  Remember, he was answering a question.  It was a planned strategy for action.

BUT, I will definitely be more cautious in the future to look to see which account I have open before I engage my fingers and attempt to keep my professional and personal lives apart.

Until next I ramble on...

1 comment:

  1. This is tricky. I think if you were a YA writer, you would definitely need to be more concerned about comments you make for your persona never to get back to you - especially if you have kids following you. But I saw the post and while I could see some folks having their shackles raised, it wasn't a bad post... just provocative. I have no answers of whether to keep it or not - totally your decision and I support you either way.